The 2WW is REAL!

This 2WW (two-week wait) is not a joke. I had read about it prior to our transfer and thought to myself, I’ll be ok, I’ve been waiting long enough… I can do 2 more weeks.

This seems like a different kind of waiting.

(Maybe I’m just making that up in my head or trying to justify it).

We returned from the transfer 7 days ago and I have been feeling every single twinge and cramp as though it means something.Image result for 2 week wait

I am exhibiting all the signs I read about and it could be:

a) that I’m pregnant or b) that the hormones I’m taking are working.

I have had weird cramps, but not really period cramps, over the first few days after the transfer (is that implantation cramping?).

I didn’t bleed at all. Dr. O said I probably wouldn’t because of the progesterone oil.

Oh yes, those shots continue… every morning.

I feel like I have gotten used to the pain and now my bottom just feels sore all the time, like I completed a good squatting and lunge workout yesterday and am feeling the effects.

I’ve started warming up the oil by placing it in between my legs in my lap while I do my quiet time in the morning. The nurse said it helps to make the oil body temperature. I also am sitting on the heating pad after.

I do have soreness and tenderness in another area, but this could be the hormones too.

Unfortunately, there is nothing conclusive except for a pregnancy test that will say for sure.

How many days past the FET (frozen embryo transfer) must we wait?

Well, we have a blood test scheduled by Dr. O for 2 weeks after the FET (meaning next week), by that point there should be no doubt of pregnancy.

BUT… I have read others taking a home pregnancy test (HPT) as early as 5 days after a day 5 FET. Meaning, our embryo grew in the clinic until day 5 before being frozen, tested, thawed, and transferred, so the thought is little Coffee Bean implanted 36 hours – 2 days after the FET and has been connected to my body ever since.

So, we did what I think all people would do, we ordered the HPT that detects early pregnancy and will most likely test in a day or two… wait a few days… tests again… and then have the blood test.

I know, I know. We could wait one more week, as the doctor recommended… but she didn’t say NOT to do the HPT. 🙂 Plus, one week seems like such a long time!

I actually have gotten used to the unknown space we are in and am choosing to believe that we are pregnant and have been talking to Maxee and praying for Maxee to grow healthy.

Either way, we will know soon enough.

What are we doing in the meantime?

Well, we have google searched FET day 6, day 7, day 8 and pretty much learned about the implantation process and the growth of the placenta.

The next phase will be the brain, heart, spinal cord and gastrointestinal tract. SO cool to learn how these things start to form.

I am at peace knowing that we either are pregnant and have 9 months of change to look forward to… or we will gear up for round 2 of IVF and begin preparing my body for the next retrieval.

I am ready to be pregnant and to bring a little one into this world… my heart is hopeful but protected.

Deep breath… calm heart. All is well.

Operation: Bring Maxee home

Sunday: This morning we left Denver on our 36-hour jaunt to Maryland to pick up Maxee and bring it home. Although we haven’t discussed names, choosing a nickname has been hard! I like the playful spin-off our last name with “Coffee Bean”, but we land on Maxee.

On the plane, I sat next to a delightful man from Boulder who is flying to DC for a national science convention when he asked where I was going, I shared about our fertility journey and how excited and hopeful we are for this weekend. I love being able to embrace this story and see the joy and magnificence this brings as the combination of nature, God, and science.

Our night is spent celebrating little Maxee (living in the petri dish at Shady Grove clinic) by eating a delicious meal at Wildfire restaurant at Tyson’s Corner.

We know it’s not a guarantee this will end with a beautiful baby in our arms, but we are grateful for this opportunity.

Tomorrow we get to reunite with our little one.

This is the closest we have come to being pregnant, and are enjoying every moment.


Monday: 10am: I am receiving my final acupuncture before the transfer. Sitting under the heat lamp, my body is preparing for the transfer.

11:15am: Here I am, sitting on the cream couch, with Property Brothers playing on the flat screen in the background. I am sitting, after just emptying my bladder and refilling it with exactly 16oz of water… Waiting.

I get to take my embybaby (Maxee) home today and it gets to be and grow inside of me until it’s ready to come out. My prayer is that in the next 9-10 months I am able to pour every ounce of love, prayer, hope, confidence, and health into this little one. My heart is happy to be sitting here and a little nervous.

  • What will the procedure feel like?
  • How will I feel after?

I can’t believe this is as close as we have been to have our own baby!

  • What will it be like to be pregnant?
  • How will I feel?
  • What will the next few weeks mean for me?

So many unknowns.

My stomach is a little crampy but mostly calm.

I am 45 minutes away from being semi-pregnant!


At what point does one become pregnant?

  • Is it a successful transfer?
  • A successful nesting or implantation?
  • It is it with the results of the pregnancy test in two weeks?

I have been praying for a healthy womb, for a clear space to call home.

Free of any negative energy and in its place a positive, healthy home that will encourage and support little Maxee.


“Hilary Maxwell”… it’s time to go!

12 noon: we are called back to the room.

12:20: Dr. O’Brien welcomes us, shares the news that our one embryo is in the incubator and thawed out perfectly. She shares that the 2nd embryo with the genetic mismatch had an extra chromosome 3 (meaning either Hubby or I contributed 14 instead of 13 chromosomes, making this particular embryo not viable.)

Joining her are 2 nurses. One nurse squirts the ultrasound jelly on my stomach and pushes the monitoring wand on my bladder (yup, cavity full!) and the second nurse asks me to confirm my name, date of birth, and social security number before she confirms the one embryo with me and Dr. O and then leaves the room.

Dr. O is a delight and we engage in small talk about what’s about to happen as she inserts the catheter into place (yup, that’s an uncomfortable pinch).

Hubby pulls out his phone and begins to film what we see on the large screen tv plastered on the wall.

UNADJUSTEDNONRAW_thumb_8767.jpgOur second nurse is in the lab next to us and has taken control of the TV screen. Before us, blown up, is the petri dish with a couple of air bubbles and this round thing with a cluster of little circles inside… that’s our Maxee, 5 days ‘old’.

12:26pm: Nurse draws the liquid and embryo into a syringe type and enters into our room. She and Dr. O exchange a specific protocol for transferring the syringe filled with liquid and our embryo. It reminds me of when I used to rock climb and the belayer and climber had to exchange a control check before the climber proceeded to climb.

“On belay, belay on, climbing, climb on”.

Dr. O wiggles the already inserted catheter so we can see it on the screen (and yes, I can feel it) and then proceeds to insert the filled-syringe into the catheter and in a matter of seconds we see a white blurb… our embryo on the screen shoot out from the catheter. It lands just where Dr. O wanted and it’s been a successful transfer. (Hubby gets it all on film!)

12:30pm: Maxee is with me!

I continue to lay there with a drape over me as Dr. O spends 15 more minutes with us answering our questions and unknowingly validating our decision to work with her.

I am scared to use my stomach muscles to sit up and even more scared to stand up, let alone go to the bathroom.

What if Maxee falls out of me?

I am assured Maxee won’t and begin to dress.

Our discharge nurse helps us to know exactly where the progesterone shots are to occur on my backside (we were just a ‘little’ off) and I head for my final acupuncture appointment to help the blood flow before we head to the airport.

Dr. O did not prescribe bedrest, just casual walking, and no heavy lifting or intense working out for 2 weeks.

We asked about skiing. She was hesitant to answer and her worry is more about if I am hit by someone else on the mountain. Although she said no, she also said it really depends on how crowded the mountain and the likelihood of me getting into a tumble.

I don’t know what my answer will be for myself, but for now, the answer is no as I let Maxee get situated.

7:30pm: I can’t believe I am sitting here on the airplane back to Denver, with a little embryo growing inside of me.

I know how fast the cells multiplied in those 5 days after fertilization and can only imagine what is happening inside of me right now.

Dr. O said implantation can occur in 36 hours and there is no way of truly feeling it happening. She even debunked the thought of implantation bleeding, although might be slight, the bleeding people experience is at times a few days after the implantation. Since I’m on both estrogen and progesterone the likelihood of any bleeding is slim to none, so I know not to be looking for anything as a sign this week.

Hubby called me ‘mommy’ for the first time today, I like how that sounds.

Although I feel excited by the opportunity and possibility, I am also very aware that this little one may not take and we might not be pregnant.

It’s a 70% chance of pregnancy at this point… that still leaves 30%. So I am going to keep things mellow for my body this week, eat warm foods, drink warm water to give Maxee a wonderful environment to enjoy and get a lot of rest.

Tonight, we get to bring our Maxee home and pray that it sticks to become a viable pregnancy. We still hold our breath until we have a positive pregnancy test.

The 2-week wait (2WW) begins.

Pins & Needles… or just a pin cushion?

Wednesday- right side

Thursday- left side

Friday- right side

Saturday- left side

Sunday- right side

I’m beginning to look like a pincushion on my backside with little prick marks across the upper region.

Hubby has done a wonderful job as I know this is not easy for him to be inflicting minor pain on me each morning and standing by as I limp off to begin my day.

Image result for upper quadrant of buttock

By no fault of his, he crept a little too close to my middle region of my back area and boy was that a rough day. Thankfully we have clarified where the upper quadrant is for this to continue.

If we are fortunate, we will continue with these morning shots and the three pills a day for the next 10-12 weeks.

Yes, shots in the buttock for the entire first trimester.

The progesterone and estrogen combination is helpful in continuing to create a safe home for Coffee Bean to be secure and to grow healthy.

Unfortunately for me, this means morning IM shots and a day with soreness when I walk and sit.

This is all worth it… this is totally worth it.

I have continued seeing my acupuncturist, 4 times over these past 14 days. Her main focus has been to increase blood flow to the uterus.

This time she has had me laying on my stomach and needling areas of my lower back and connecting stimulation clips that provide an additional current to help encourage the response for blood flow.

I can honestly say I have done everything I can think of to prepare my body for this little one to rest and grow.

Tomorrow, we fly!